So,it’s been quite some time since I hit the blog, well, more of a writer’s block, you could say? Anyway, with that slowly evaporating, I think I’m going to gear up to get the ink grooving in me.
Update. I shifted to a new place. How long has it been? Almost a month. What I learnt? Living. In its true sense. Right from my childhood, I have been moving places – new people, new faces, that’s a ubiquitous scenario in my life. Now, that doesn’t mean I’m well suited for this lifestyle. I cry every time I leave a place and I cry every time I enter a new place. Before I let loose my Bakugans for that lane, I’m gonna stay firm on this one. Presently, this sounds more like a rant and well, at this point, I admit it is.
After two, make that almost three weeks of cooping up in the room, except for the routine of heading to work and coming back to the room, I decided to step out. To a place that’s like 5 minutes away from my location, but progress nevertheless. Who said moving to a new place is easy? You think it is? Well, good for you. Google mapped the place, got the time and location ready and I set out for the much planned solo trip. As I locked my room, I realized there’s no one to say bye to. As I stepped outside I realized, it’s cold outside. Maybe cold inside too? As I walked slowly, I realized how busy people were in lives of their own. Well plotted areas of interest with people moving about like spiders weaving their own webs and building their domain with utmost intricacy, the only difference here being we are trapped in our own webs. Pause. Think about it.
I couldn’t help but feel isolated. Here’s a note. This is not a cry for help. It is not cribbing either. It is just what transpired. You know how they say every single being is basically barely a speck in the cosmos. I felt that. Nobody who knew me, nobody whom I knew. It was strange because it gave me a blow of confidence and with that, it took some away too. With everything moving about at a roller coaster-ed pace in my life, at this point, I felt – for every step I took forward, I was taking ten back. I trudged ahead, came across a beautiful lake. One step forward now. There was a serenity it possessed. A stark contrast to the storm brewing up in my head. Still, it overpowered and for a brief while, it managed to subdue the raging rains of thought in my mind. There comes a point in life where one starts to question everything. Probably, that phase arrives twice. Once when you were an infant oh-so-eager to know the working of the world around you, the second when you’re an adult and you’re now exhausted from knowing the working of the world around you. Right?
But. Yes, there’s always a but. There’s a purpose we are all here to serve. I suppose so. There is that one cluster of people out there who are looking out for you. Maybe one yet to come or maybe one that’s already there. *Quick note, if you know you’ve been there for me, here’s a Thank you and while you’re reading this, you know who you are.* I have this habit of pondering over my own questions and finding answers to them by planting it carefully into conversations and finding different points of view and then rationalizing them. Seen the clothes in a washing machine after they’re washed? They seem to appear in a mess but once you untangle them from each other, you’re free to hang them up to dry. I give this example to reinforce the fact that I’m learning to live. And then, you pick your OOTD. Much the same way, I go about my thoughts. A clusterfuck of them, but somehow I get them straightened out and the saga continues. However for that period, when I can read my thoughts, the world seems to be a better place to live in. Don’t you think so too?
I know you maybe tired of hearing that there’s a plan out there for you. And for the ones who are tired of the suspense, I feel you. But I think life’s a puzzle, it’s a picture of pieces scattered around and it’s waiting for you to have the courage to pick those pieces up, let alone placing the pieces together and this is regardless of the fact that the puzzle might seem tiresome to finish or that you feel like you have less time. Well, nobody’s figured out a puzzle at one go, right? It’s through iterations. Frustrating ones and some simple ones but an intertwined one, nevertheless. Life’s giving you chances – take it up. You wish to write? Write. You wish to dance? You don’t even need to have a song, loose yourself to your rhythm. You wish to sing? Get that melody out. You wish to study ahead? Yes, spread your wings across and fly. But you get your trial, cut it through. At the end, you know, the picture you’ve placed together, with your own effort, will be worth it! It’s clouds and some rain, then it’s a clear sky. Endrant.